Episode Reviews

The Drunk Train

“The Drunk Train” is another Valentines Day episode, but fortunately it lays off the sappiness while moving along the storyline with some very tough developments.

First off, we have the usual Ted neediness looking for a date for Valentines revolves around Ted and Barney taking the “drunk train,” (the last train of the night) to Long Island. This leads up to some goofy exchanges between drunken passengers and humorous failures on both Barney and Ted’s part.

The reason that they are even on the train though, is the fact that Lily and Marshal invited Robin and Kevin to spend the weekend with them up in Vermont, leaving their home open to Ted and Barney. It is here we see that things are going a little too well between Robin and Kevin, whom is head over heals in love with Robin, and completely ignoring the obvious issues between them with a marriage proposal.

Now granted, Robin had yet to reveal the fact that she not only cannot have children but also does not want children to Kevin, the writing has been on the wall for that particular matter for some time. Kevin is the ideal nice guy, willing to do anything to keep Robin happy, but like many nice guys, he’s blinded deep down on the issues that would make their relationship last the test of time. Strangely, it’s Robin herself showing real growth in character realizing it wasn’t fair to him, pushing Kevin away to the point that he actually leaves. It’s been a heartbreaking season so far for Robin, first with her watching Barney fawn over Nora, then cheating on Kevin with Barney, and then learning she can never have her own children.

It’s not been a very happy and cheery storyline with Robin at all, which is what makes How I Met Your Mother the show that it is. It’s a show about friends, and the trials and tribulations they go though in life with a mix of goofy silly humor. In this case, it’s about the things we do in relationships, and the things we owe each other over the course of a relationship. In Robin’s case though, she understands that owing Kevin his dream of having children is just too great to bear.

Meanwhile, back on the drunk train, or rather as Barney describes his evening with Quinn while being Ted’s wingman, we learn that Barney might have actually met his match in terms of a girl who not only sees though all his sleazy, but can even match it point for point. Overall though, it’s not a very compelling plot line as it doesn’t feature Quinn very heavily and mostly centers around a silly Barney and Ted adventure with both feeling a bit lousy about themselves in the end.

The irony is in the final monologue of the episode where Ted laments on how one has to realize that this journey might be over and they are on their last stop. It resolves with Ted once again declaring his love for Robin, which for one, we all know is not the mother (for so many obvious reasons), and two, feels like nothing more than a circular plot line bringing us back to the very first episode of the series. I really hope they don’t dwell on this line too long as it’s not only tired, but also a bit anti-climatic and desperate feeling. It honestly feels like it ruins what was otherwise a fun and well written episode.

Other Observations

  • Top 10 things Marshal/Lily said on his/her wedding night
    • It’s hard for the little guy to perform under pressure.
    • Stop laughing Lily
    • It was small, but I think I felt something.
    • I’m just going to close my eyes until it’s all over.
  • I hope it’s a soupy deuce sucka!
  • Robin smokes on the roof, as revealed a while back.
  • Quinn is also known as Karma, from the strip club Barney frequents constantly. It’s also probably why she knows him so well already.


  • Names for the drunk train
    • I think I can get laid
    • The Little Engine with Wood
    • The Whore-ient Express
    • The long island tail-er
    • Slam Track
    • The chata-nookie choo-choo
    • Thomas the Spank Engine (which was actually Ted’s but he took credit)
  • Funny things on the white board.
    • XXXPress Train
    • Choo + Choo = Train
    • Spray – Tan Divisor * Hairspray Coefficient
    • 18 x 36D^2 x (no cars) = Max {Cans}
    • U Think ( U > Me)? (“You think you better than me?”)
  • Tonight is going to be epic..wait for it…dary…wait. ..oh I hate this Quinn girl.

By Kien Tran

Based in Dallas, Texas, Kien Tran is an avid television enthusiast. After spending hundreds of hours wasting away on a couch, he decided to actually do something creative with his hobby and created this very blog.

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